Category Archives: Reports

A Dangerous Business

Once upon a time I ran a weekly student newspaper. Long story. Suffice to say it was the best of times, the worst of times, and all sorts of strange in-between times that no amount of whiskey or therapy will … Continue reading

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Lonely Eyes

So here’s something weird. A little while back I was typing on my laptop in a coffee shop near my place (yes yes, I know, writing in a coffee shop: I’m that big of a cliché), when this woman came … Continue reading

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So Then I Bought A Dresser

A few years ago I lived with a woman who I thought was the love of my life. Our breakup—which was sad, protracted, eviscerating, humiliating, terrifying, shocking to anyone who knew us—was one of the worst moments of my life, … Continue reading

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The Day I Met Charlie Sheen

Back in high school I dated a girl whose father didn’t like me very much. After a while he even stopped using my name and started calling me, with a sneering disdain he didn’t bother to hide, “Mister Jovial.” I … Continue reading

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Open to Suggestion

The terrifying rumours are true. Very soon, I will be unleashing an annoyingly (in)frequent torrent of rambling rants, ruminations, and reports from the reckless and improbable adventures that consume my life. Not just because some of you asked for it, … Continue reading

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